Question by User MocanuVlad
Advice from anyone is more than welcome, but i assume my question is more for the ladies of r/bachata. How do you feel if an inexperienced lead asks you to dance?
I am a beginner, i have a decent grasp of the basic moves & turns, still doing classes to learn more. Whenever i go to a bachata party, i’m reluctant to ask ladies to dance because i fear they’ll just be bored doing the basic routines that i know. Can you please give me your thoughts on this?
I don’t mind beginner leads, even if all we do is the basic for the whole song. Several years ago, I was the one messing up, apologizing, stepping on feet, etc and so many experienced leads helped me through – so I want to help give beginners that confidence too.
What I like to see in a beginning lead is someone who picks himself up quickly after a mistake and who is having fun. Mistakes happen even to the very best dancers, but as long as you can recollect yourself, get the beat and get moving again – you’ll both be able to laugh and move on.
Honestly if someone gives you a hard time because you only know a few combinations – just don’t dance with them again. We were all beginners once, but not everyone has that same mindset.
Anyone can say no to a dance at anytime for any reason. It’s part of the process to shake that “no” off and move on.
Good luck and have fun on the dance floor.
Try to go to the lesson before the party if there is one, that way you’ll know who the rookies are. When I was a beginner I only danced with more experienced follows if they asked me or if I knew they were very nice. A follow who gets irritated when you are off time will make for a bad night.
If there’s a group chat for this (FB/Whatsapp/Telegram) then make sure the people in your class are on it. If there isn’t one then go start one. That helped me immensely.
Male lead here, but in my experience getting feedback from follows, they just want the lead to lead well, and the number of moves he knows isn’t important.
I’ve watched leads that knew so many impressive looking advanced moves and turns, and after the dance I ask the follow what it was like to dance with him. To my surprise, they sometimes say their hands or shoulders hurt because the guy was too rough in some way, or they might say the lead did not lead well so they had a hard time following.
I’m lucky enough to have teachers that emphasize how to be a good lead first above everything, and I ask for feedback from people I’ve danced with.
Once in a while, a follow might give you feedback that you didn’t ask for. Consider their advice, and apply it to future dances.