Going to socials by yourself!

Question

Any advice on how to go to socials by yourself where you know zero people? Anything would help! Thanks in advance

Answers

User vonRecklinghausen

I travel a lot and I always find a social in a new city so I’ve some experience going to socials solo. I’m a follow btw and I’m very paranoid that no one will ask me to dance, especially since I’m new. And because I’m only an intermediate level dancer, I can barely do shines.

It usually just takes one dance to break that ice tbh. Once people see you dance with others, that encourages them to ask you for a dance.

Wear dance shoes so people know you’re there to dance, and not just an onlooker. It’s difficult though, especially if it’s a dance club floor and you don’t want to ruin your soles.

Make eye contact!

If nothing else- go ask them! It’s awkward but you’re there for a good time, if people see you having a good time, they’ll automatically want to dance with you.

This being said, I’ve been to some very rude socials where people just dance with people they know, which is terrible dance floor etiquette imho

User itspartytimeguys

Stand by the dance floor. Make eye contact with people you want to dance with, a mans basic manners should take care of the rest. Competent follows get absorbed into scene rapidly in my experience. If you see a good lead, ask him to dance… he will tell his friends and the rest is written in the stars.

User RProgrammerMan

As I guy I love when women ask me to dance because I then know they actually want to dance with me. I then know they aren’t dancing with me because they are too afraid to say no to me.

User NoHalf9

Some comments on making yourself available.

As mentioned in another comment, standing close to the dance floor is a good position to be in. Specifically you want to be standing where most of the traffic to/from the dance floor is, e.g. if one side of the dance floor is a wall with chairs to sit on while the other side is towards an open area with tables then you want to stand on that side (assuming that is where most people are located). And standing is better than sitting because there is a lower barrier ask you to dance then.

Another tip is to give visible cues that you are into the music by moving your body to the rythm, thereby giving out a signal that you enjoy the music and implicitly that you have a higher probability of having dance interest and skills compared to those that is not doing that (e.g. they might just be there together with friends and not be interested in the dance as such).

I make deliberate effort into making people feel included, so when I see new people I do not know almost always ask them to dance. If they are two or three together I will probably ask all of them eventually but I will start with the one that seems most into the music.

Also do not be afraid to ask men to dance. I love it. And if you really want to make a great impression, if you come jogging with a positive “hey, come let’s dance” smile and ask me for a dance that is golden and will be remembered for a long time (for instance I still remember one girl doing that 20+ years ago when I had just started to dance).

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