Quiet Desperation

I am writing this for myself.

This will be a constant reminder of why I am chasing this dream.

If I do not give 110% on this endeavor, I will continue to suffer silently.

I have never worked at a job I truly enjoy.

I have had maybe 5-7 jobs in my life.

One was fast food, a couple were retail, another was IT.

I am currently serving in the military.

If I continue on my current path, I will be a miserable old man one day.

I would love to make more money, but if I could make just enough money doing this. To the point where I can be my own boss, and I do not have to come into work.

If I could get to a place where all my time and energy can be devoted to me and my personal endeavors.

That would be a beautiful place.
That would be worth all the effort and time.

I wrote this for me, as a reminder of why I need to grind every day.
No matter how long it takes.

I just need to be patient, because time never stops.

I will be 35 one day, so I may as well build toward something.

I wrote this for me as a reminder that if i give up, it will be back to suffering silently.

A strong feeling of resentment will start to build up inside me. And it will slowly infect me like a disease.

And it will effect how I intact with people. I will become cold hearted, jealous, angry, resentful.

And it will be my fault, because I gave up on my dream.

I do not want that for myself.

I wrote this to be a constant reminder of why I need to work hard every day.

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